I couldn't do two difficult posts in one day. It's been hard enough to process everything that is going on internally, let alone trying to communicate it out to friends and family.
Alex has finally chosen a path - at least for this coming year. And that path is working at Camphill Ballytobin in Ireland. Yes, I said Ireland!
Camphill is an international charitable trust working with people with intellectual disabilities and other kinds of special needs. This one in particular is working with children with special needs.
Alex's 12th grade end of year trip was working at a Camphill in Pennsylvania and he did an amazing job there. Though it was difficult at times, he truly enjoyed his overall experience and, after taking time off this past year doing three different jobs, decided that this is what he wants to do next.
He has been accepted and has to wait for his passport to come, then he will be on his way.
So, in a few more weeks Alex will be packed up and boarding a plane to Callan, Co. Kilkenny, Ireland.
I am incredibly proud of him and glad to see him continue the work that he seemed to connect to and do so well at back when he was in 12th grade in high school. He has an amazing skill working with all children of all ages, but to be able to handle and connect to children with special needs is completely amazing and humbling and awe inspiring for me.
More to come on the exact date he leaves - and then from there, hopefully lots of photos and emails and skype calls to keep up with his next year in Ireland!
Tuesday, July 31, 2012
Monday, July 30, 2012
Between Pride and Panic
Some of you have already experienced your children growing up and going out to have their own life... others, well, there is still so much to look forward to before that happens.
It's funny how you raise your children, knowing deep down inside that they are not yours, but a gift to you to guide and love, and learn from as well as teach. We raised our boys to be conscientious objectors - or, so we thought.
I sit here, with highly mixed emotions - somewhere between pride and panic - as Jared is in Raleigh this evening, having finished up his ASVAB and, tomorrow has his physical, goes over his test score to figure out his career, and then takes the pledge to become a Marine!
Yes, that's right - a marine.
He was contacted by a recruiter about 3 or 4 weeks ago, after having gone to their website and asked to be contacted a month or more prior. This isn't coming to us a complete surprise as he has been talking about becoming a police officer, or possibly joining the military for the past year or so. But the discussions were that, and nothing more.
And now that discussion has finally become a reality.
(The panic...) I am thankful that it was a year long discussion, as the first time Jared mentioned his interest in possibly joining the military to us, it took every ounce of ourselves to not blurt out, "Are you fucking nuts?" but to calmly just listen and nod and say, "Okay, well, that is a possibility... that you should think hard on, and research to see if you are sure." And then, each time it came back up the seriousness of it kept sinking in more and more. But even after all that time and talk, having the reality upon us is still a struggle - with all the dangers that come along with being in the military, along with no longer being an individual but part of the collective of the government, and so on.
(The pride...) The other side of the coin is what an amazing young man he has become to feel the need to do something as courageous as becoming a marine. Wanting to help people, wanting to be a part of something bigger, wanting to better himself as a human being, wanting to push himself to new limits and see how he comes out on the other end! These are things we should all strive for - and so I am overwhelmed with pride for my baby (yes, he will always be my baby) boy to be brave enough to do!
For all of you parents out there who's children are still young - just remember that they all have their own paths to follow - and the best thing you can do is to give them all the support and love you can to help them on their way!
Once we know more tomorrow about what his career choices are, and, more importantly, when he'll be shipping off to Boot Camp - I will post something more.
I leave you with some Absolute Standards of the Marines - that I had been posting on Facebook...
The Marines set some absolute standards for their people to follow:
Tell the truth.
Don't give up.
Don't whine or make excuses.
Do your best, no matter how trivial the task.
Choose a difficult right over the easy wrong.
Look out for the group before you look out for yourself.
Judge others by their actions, not their words or their race.
Have a Fulfilling Life
It's funny how you raise your children, knowing deep down inside that they are not yours, but a gift to you to guide and love, and learn from as well as teach. We raised our boys to be conscientious objectors - or, so we thought.
I sit here, with highly mixed emotions - somewhere between pride and panic - as Jared is in Raleigh this evening, having finished up his ASVAB and, tomorrow has his physical, goes over his test score to figure out his career, and then takes the pledge to become a Marine!
Yes, that's right - a marine.
He was contacted by a recruiter about 3 or 4 weeks ago, after having gone to their website and asked to be contacted a month or more prior. This isn't coming to us a complete surprise as he has been talking about becoming a police officer, or possibly joining the military for the past year or so. But the discussions were that, and nothing more.
And now that discussion has finally become a reality.
(The panic...) I am thankful that it was a year long discussion, as the first time Jared mentioned his interest in possibly joining the military to us, it took every ounce of ourselves to not blurt out, "Are you fucking nuts?" but to calmly just listen and nod and say, "Okay, well, that is a possibility... that you should think hard on, and research to see if you are sure." And then, each time it came back up the seriousness of it kept sinking in more and more. But even after all that time and talk, having the reality upon us is still a struggle - with all the dangers that come along with being in the military, along with no longer being an individual but part of the collective of the government, and so on.
(The pride...) The other side of the coin is what an amazing young man he has become to feel the need to do something as courageous as becoming a marine. Wanting to help people, wanting to be a part of something bigger, wanting to better himself as a human being, wanting to push himself to new limits and see how he comes out on the other end! These are things we should all strive for - and so I am overwhelmed with pride for my baby (yes, he will always be my baby) boy to be brave enough to do!
For all of you parents out there who's children are still young - just remember that they all have their own paths to follow - and the best thing you can do is to give them all the support and love you can to help them on their way!
Once we know more tomorrow about what his career choices are, and, more importantly, when he'll be shipping off to Boot Camp - I will post something more.
I leave you with some Absolute Standards of the Marines - that I had been posting on Facebook...
The Marines set some absolute standards for their people to follow:
Tell the truth.
Don't give up.
Don't whine or make excuses.
Do your best, no matter how trivial the task.
Choose a difficult right over the easy wrong.
Look out for the group before you look out for yourself.
Judge others by their actions, not their words or their race.
Have a Fulfilling Life
Friday, February 4, 2011
Alex's 12th Grade Project...
Here is the website he just built, on his own, for his 12th grade project... enjoy and keep checking back. Our son, the artist!
http://www.wix.com/ale261/volsung-saga
http://www.wix.com/ale261/volsung-saga
Wednesday, November 3, 2010
Junior Internship...nothing like last minute!
The Junior class at Emerson Waldorf School have to do one week of an internship every year. Last year Alex did his week internship with an art therapy school learning about art therapy. It has helped bolster his desire to seriously continue on that career path and is now looking into colleges that would help support him.
Jared mentioned last year that he was interested in becoming a police officer and wondered whether they took on interns. At the time I advised him that we would check into it but that he should consider a second option just in case that was not possible. Well, time got away and before we knew it school started up this year.
We eventually got in contact with the Hillsborough Police Department - and though they did do internships in the administrative side, they did not do internships with the actual police. And, because of some event that was happening in October the particular week Jared needed was not possible. They did have a program called The Explorer Post which was a year commitment for two Saturday's a month learning about becoming a police officer. We had nixed the idea in the beginning because it did not fit the criteria the school wanted.
So, we moved on to the Chapel Hill Police - who had an internship but it was for 17 and 18 year olds and it was a year commitment - not old enough. So back to the drawing board.
We attempted to contact his back-up choice of Architect but we were having no luck on any local places being available that week either.
So we asked to see if the Explorer Post would work in lieu of the one week - as I felt a whole year had to be much more worthy and education than just a week. At first we were advised yes, then we were advised no, that he still needed something for the week of internships. And now it's the Thursday before the internship is supposed to start!
Luckily for me I happened to complain to just the right parent at our school about the whole thing and she said, "How about the sheriff's office? I happen to know the sheriff and his daughter. Let me check on that!" And off she went.
Well, it was incredibly last minute, Sunday as a matter of fact but she called back and said that Jared was all set to start on Monday at the Orange County Sheriff's Office in downtown Hillsborough.... Yipee!!!!
Jared had an awesome week and really seemed to enjoy himself! He went out a couple of times cruising a rougher neighborhood with some of the inspectors, learned about finger prints and how to lift them off objects with different devices, he saw an interview, went to the court, went to the jail, and also saw many old weapons from old cases that had not yet been destroyed. He also did a lot of filing for them and got to see lots of graphic photos of some of the cases the different inspectors had worked on over the years. All-in-all I think he had a great experience and that this has strengthened his desire to become a law enforcement agent of some kind.
He is still going to start the Explorer Post as well and see how where that takes him over the next year. I can't wait! I'm very happy to see him so happy, engaged and interested in something so noble!
Jared mentioned last year that he was interested in becoming a police officer and wondered whether they took on interns. At the time I advised him that we would check into it but that he should consider a second option just in case that was not possible. Well, time got away and before we knew it school started up this year.
We eventually got in contact with the Hillsborough Police Department - and though they did do internships in the administrative side, they did not do internships with the actual police. And, because of some event that was happening in October the particular week Jared needed was not possible. They did have a program called The Explorer Post which was a year commitment for two Saturday's a month learning about becoming a police officer. We had nixed the idea in the beginning because it did not fit the criteria the school wanted.
So, we moved on to the Chapel Hill Police - who had an internship but it was for 17 and 18 year olds and it was a year commitment - not old enough. So back to the drawing board.
We attempted to contact his back-up choice of Architect but we were having no luck on any local places being available that week either.
So we asked to see if the Explorer Post would work in lieu of the one week - as I felt a whole year had to be much more worthy and education than just a week. At first we were advised yes, then we were advised no, that he still needed something for the week of internships. And now it's the Thursday before the internship is supposed to start!
Luckily for me I happened to complain to just the right parent at our school about the whole thing and she said, "How about the sheriff's office? I happen to know the sheriff and his daughter. Let me check on that!" And off she went.
Well, it was incredibly last minute, Sunday as a matter of fact but she called back and said that Jared was all set to start on Monday at the Orange County Sheriff's Office in downtown Hillsborough.... Yipee!!!!
Jared had an awesome week and really seemed to enjoy himself! He went out a couple of times cruising a rougher neighborhood with some of the inspectors, learned about finger prints and how to lift them off objects with different devices, he saw an interview, went to the court, went to the jail, and also saw many old weapons from old cases that had not yet been destroyed. He also did a lot of filing for them and got to see lots of graphic photos of some of the cases the different inspectors had worked on over the years. All-in-all I think he had a great experience and that this has strengthened his desire to become a law enforcement agent of some kind.
He is still going to start the Explorer Post as well and see how where that takes him over the next year. I can't wait! I'm very happy to see him so happy, engaged and interested in something so noble!
Monday, October 11, 2010
Heartbreak and Heartache...
There's always something new to experience as a parent but, even though I knew this might happen eventually, I was saddened that it happened so soon. This is one of those things that you cannot truly fix and make better as a parent - you have to watch your son or daughter from the sidelines, giving love when you can, but really, just watching them work through it (hopefully) and eventually moving on.
Jared's girlfriend Ashley broke up with him after about 6 months of dating. Her reasons were not truly understood and a bit confusing which only hurts more. I think it would be better to say the hard things then to say "I need space. I think we've grown as much as we can. I still want to be your friend." sigh.
But at 16 it's hard to truly say what it was about the other person you didn't like anymore - or maybe never liked - so they try to break up "nicely" and try not to hurt the other's feelings. I get that, but it's hard to grasp from the other side.
It breaks my heart to know that Jared had opened up so much from meeting Ashley - playing games that he would normally not have played, read books he would have NEVER read, seen movies he would have never seen, for his girlfriend because it made her happy and he cared enough for her to want to make her happy. To see him hold her hand and make her laugh; to see him go to the hospital, if only for an hour or two to keep her company and make her feel loved and cared for to be told the above. They had never even fought, not once in the 6 months they were together. She seemed to constantly want to get together with him and then not want to leave when it was time to go home. So this is a difficult switch - as if someone just turned her off - and it's hurting my son.
There's nothing I can do but offer my love and listen if he wants to talk - there's no words of wisdom to impart on this one as I don't understand why Ashley did it. If she had said "You are to pushy about wanting to have sex." or "We never do what I want but only what you want." I can give him words of wisdom of how to grow and change. But to say, "Maybe you cared too much for her?" just doesn't seem right. So it's, "You didn't do anything wrong. There's something wrong with her." Which doesn't make it any better or any easier.
This one's tough for me because I've always loved my role of "fix it and make it better" with boo-boo's and the such. But, this is one boo-boo that I can't truly fix... and it breaks my heart.
Thursday, September 23, 2010
Welcome to senior year in a waldorf school!
So the year has started off with a bang! Alex's class went to Maine for a zoology block trip to a place called Hermit Island! It sounded like it was a blast and I think Alex really enjoyed himself and learned a lot. The best part about this trip is that they spent it with 7 other waldorf high schools and about 100 senior waldorf students. So they know they aren't the only "weird waldorf" students out there! Alex made friends with a few students from the Toronto Waldorf School and had them on his facebook shortly after he got back, as well as the Atlanta Waldorf School. I'll post a link to the photos later.
Then we have the college visits starting up in which Alex is now looking at Guilford (Greensboro, NC) and possibly Brevard (Asheville, NC - Kim, the mountains, where we were when I was in white water rafting hell!). So we shall see how the year progresses. For now it's starting to work on scholarships - which will be a learning curve for all of us. Jared doesn't know how lucky he is that we'll be skilled for next year! HA!
We are still only a one car family so the guys have not had their practice to finish up their licensing sadly. I keep hoping it will be soon to get a 2nd used vehicle...sigh. So it's lots of driving them around for their dates and outings.
I stepped up to be the class parent for 12th grade - for those of you who know Waldorf you know that's a big job... and even bigger for 12th grade as we still have their end of year trip we need to earn money for and their graduation... wheee. So, fundraising here we come!
Jared will be starting up his internship next month for his Junior year. At this point he is still interested in being a police officer so he need to contact them this week to see if that's possible. If it is not then he next choice is Architect - don't see the correlation but at least he has a second option and either of them sound interesting to me! I think he would be great at both but we'll see what comes of it all!
Alex has his senior project as well - which is a big deal at our school. They use most of the year working on it and then in the spring they will have a presentation night to talk about their project to the community (parents, other students, etc). His project is creating a Graphic Novel - from the story creation, art work, lettering and inking - truly a huge project! He is hoping that it is worthy enough for publishing at the end. And he has found a alum parent who used to do that for a living as his mentor and we are very excited about it! It fits Alex perfectly! He was so excited about it that he started this summer with working out his idea and starting on the story line - so he's off to a great start!
I completely skipped over summer but I will get back to it at a later post and talk about my great week vacation at the beach with my sister - but for now I wanted to get all of that out there before time slipped by and we were on to the next thing in life!
Kelley
Then we have the college visits starting up in which Alex is now looking at Guilford (Greensboro, NC) and possibly Brevard (Asheville, NC - Kim, the mountains, where we were when I was in white water rafting hell!). So we shall see how the year progresses. For now it's starting to work on scholarships - which will be a learning curve for all of us. Jared doesn't know how lucky he is that we'll be skilled for next year! HA!
We are still only a one car family so the guys have not had their practice to finish up their licensing sadly. I keep hoping it will be soon to get a 2nd used vehicle...sigh. So it's lots of driving them around for their dates and outings.
I stepped up to be the class parent for 12th grade - for those of you who know Waldorf you know that's a big job... and even bigger for 12th grade as we still have their end of year trip we need to earn money for and their graduation... wheee. So, fundraising here we come!
Jared will be starting up his internship next month for his Junior year. At this point he is still interested in being a police officer so he need to contact them this week to see if that's possible. If it is not then he next choice is Architect - don't see the correlation but at least he has a second option and either of them sound interesting to me! I think he would be great at both but we'll see what comes of it all!
Alex has his senior project as well - which is a big deal at our school. They use most of the year working on it and then in the spring they will have a presentation night to talk about their project to the community (parents, other students, etc). His project is creating a Graphic Novel - from the story creation, art work, lettering and inking - truly a huge project! He is hoping that it is worthy enough for publishing at the end. And he has found a alum parent who used to do that for a living as his mentor and we are very excited about it! It fits Alex perfectly! He was so excited about it that he started this summer with working out his idea and starting on the story line - so he's off to a great start!
I completely skipped over summer but I will get back to it at a later post and talk about my great week vacation at the beach with my sister - but for now I wanted to get all of that out there before time slipped by and we were on to the next thing in life!
Kelley
Sunday, April 18, 2010
Money Anyone??
So after reading the sob story below does anyone have about $4,000 they would like to donate to the Wiley Clan??
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